By YOUSHELL WILLIAMS

Three years ago, a counselor that I saw at an agency in my neighborhood asked me if I would like to be interviewed about my experiences with the foster care system. She said the New York City foster care system was starting a new program called CRADLE and wanted to hear from parents in Bed-Stuy who had had experiences with the system.

I saw it as a chance to tell someone about the horrible way the system had treated my family. I figured I could also use the couple of dollars they offered. I met with a man named Jerome D. Brown, who was very nice, very cordial, and listened to what I had to say.

He explained that CRADLE was created to help parents in Bed-Stuy, especially parents of children under a year old, because infants were dying or coming into foster care from the neighborhood at an alarming rate. One reason that was happening, I learned, was that young mothers didn't know what resources were available in Bed-Stuy, so they didn't know where to turn until it was too late. CRADLE was going to hold community meetings where parents could learn about services for families in the neighborhood.

A Chance to Speak

Mr. Brown asked me many questions about what happened to my family. I let him know that I felt I was treated very shabbily by the child welfare worker but that I'd gotten good family therapy through the system after my children came home.

After the interview, Mr. Brown invited me to come to a huge presentation CRADLE was giving at the Marriot Hotel in downtown Brooklyn. He said parents were welcome and would get a chance to make their concerns heard.

The workshop at the Marriot was great! I loved being there. I was able to let Bed-Stuy service providers know how I felt as a struggling parent. I explained that they needed to use a more human approach to parents. The child welfare worker who came to my home tore me down and made me feel worse about myself and afraid for my children. I needed was information about organizations that could help my children and me.

Becoming a Leader

Ever since, I've been a member of CRADLE and, since last year, the Bed-Stuy Community Partnership Initiative. I go to the monthly community meetings where many service providers come out and talk the wealth of resources in Bed-Stuy, such as individual and family counseling, help with housing and furniture, health services for pregnant women and infants, and even financial support. I wish I had known about some of these services years ago. If I'd been able to get support back in 1997, my children would not have ended up in care.

Through CRADLE I learned about a parent self-help and advocacy organization in New York City called the Child Welfare Organizing Project (CWOP). I took a six month training at CWOP to learn about parents' rights and to join with other parents in advocating to change the system.

In 2008, we ran CWOP’s first Parent Leadership Curriculum in Bed-Stuy. As a Parent Organizer with CWOP, I now train other parents about how the system works and I support parents who are dealing with the system to get their children home. We trained parents to serve as Community Representatives at Family Team Conferences and as Visit Hosts and Coaches. On June 20, we graduated our first class of Parent Leaders.

When I was scared and overwhelmed, I didn't know where to turn or what could help me. Now I make sure that what happened to me and my children won't happen to any other hardworking, loving mother or father. I let other parents know not to give up. By sticking together, we can make sure our families thrive.

The Help We Needed

Since I began working as a parent organizer, I've endured two more investigations, both related to my older son's truancy. Even though we've gone to family counseling for years, and I've sought all the supports that I know about for my son, he continues to suffer from depression and is often unwilling to attend school. His absences caused us to endure more knocks on the door, and despite all I know about parents' rights, these investigations have been terrifying for me.

I've gotten the support I needed to fight for my children through CWOP. Despite these setbacks, I believe my children and I are doing much better now. For a long time, I didn't think that I deserved my children, but now I know that no one else can be a better mother to them.

I'm so happy that CRADLE encouraged parents to join and to give voice to their concerns about their families and community, and that CWOP is out there, educating parents about their rights and supporting parents like me when we're facing a family crisis.